Our hopes were dashed every month with the onset of her period. Eventually we went to a clinic and to my dismay, it was discovered that I had an abnormally low sperm count. The specialist assured me that it had no influence on my sexuality, that it was quite commonplace, and most importantly that I might still be able to father a child. It was just that I was firing blanks most of the time. He suggested that we limit our sex to those times when she was most fertile. I must say that consulting a chart and taking her internal temperature to determine the optimum moment, was hardly likely to make for mad passionate sex. We persevered nevertheless, but with no more success than before.We were of course bitterly disappointed, but to put it in context, it was but a minor irritation compared to what Ray was going through. He was still missing Fran terribly and had lost his zest for life. Clare was becoming increasingly concerned about him. She was sure he was not eating enough so we often. "Yea, remember I came over and dropped your neice off, we were supposed to go shopping that day." Oh, that was Monica." Monica?" An old friend, she doesn't matter anymore." Oh, an old friend." Yea... You remember that" Yes and the argument we had that evening, I was lying." Excuse me?" You said the reason I gave you was wrong, you were right" Wow," What?" You weren't this blunt about things before" Is that a bad thing" I don't know yet." Oh, well... Okay." So, what was the reason why" What... Oh, well I was jealous. I saw her and thought I could never compare with that and decided to just leave it all alone and do my changing on my own" There was no reason to be jealous, none at all. When I came back from out of town, she was here and made dinner. She thought there would be more, I just couldn't, I was already liking you too much to be with another woman, I passed out on the couch and in the morning I woke up with her, she tried something, I got up and went to shower. That's when you.
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